It takes a long time to change bad habits.

It’s hard to stop the voice in your head that says “you don’t deserve good things.” It’s hard to stop believing that you only deserve love if you look a certain way. It’s hard to make those voices stop and to go outside and enjoy life, sometimes.

This morning I woke up still tired, still with a headache leftover from yesterday, and the thought of the gym did not feel like a good one.

Outside it was beautiful – the brightest blue sky – so I decided to stop lying in bed overthinking, and go out into the lovely world.

I decided I would walk around the river, and try to notice all the lovely things. It’s a route I have trodden hundreds of times, but sometimes a break from routine makes the familiar seem new. I felt like I was on an adventure by myself. Even the air smelled different – fresher.

I watched people on the way to work, and noticed how their footsteps sounded. I stopped to smell flowers and marvel at all the different shapes and colours, and bees! I watched swallows zooming through the air to catch bugs for breakfast. I watched the water move and sparkle, and saw a glitterball on a boat do the same. I saw flowers growing through the holes of a balcony. I crossed many bridges. It really turned my mood around.

When I got back to my neighbourhood, I decided to stop in to one of my local cafes for a bit of breakfast and a cuppa. There I bumped into two lovely ladies that I know and are always a positive presence, and waved hello to someone I know who works there. My heart felt full as I sat outside with my cup of tea, watching people go about their daily lives.

As soon as I got home, I sat in the garden, in the sun, in the quiet, and wrote it all down.

It really does help to do a little bit of what you want to.